Excuses, Excuses
by insomniacbookworm
Summary: Artemis' luck might just run out one of these days. Five times Artemis makes up excuses for her appearance in Gotham, and one time Robin comes up with his own, all before she knew he knew her identity.
1. Bats and Archers

AN: I came up with this idea a long time ago, but just now have written it. I'm rather happy with the result.

This chapter is made up of two short parts, the next two will be longer and the last is short again. Total of five. _Yay math!_

Also, this is not compatible - or maybe it is, actually, with Lunchtime Conspiracies. It wasn't meant to be, but now it is. Confusing. But I'm not changing that sentence. You can see it as compatible or not if you want. Whatever.

Read on!

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><p>"Heey, Artemis, long time no see."<p>

Artemis spun around at the cackling voice. She nearly pulled out her bow, except she didn't have it in civilian clothing. "Wha- Robin? What the heck?"

The boy wonder crouched on the fire escape above the teleport. "Visiting your cousin again?"

"What? I mean, yeah, he had another… spelling bee."

"He? So you have two cousins in Gotham?"

"What? No, I only have one."

"Last time you said 'she'. Unless there's a really interesting story behind that…"

"Oh! No, no, I just meant he – _she_. I was distracted."

Robin raised an eyebrow. "Right. Well, get tracted, 'cause Batman's not going to be happy if we're L-A-t-E."

.

._breakline._

_._

"Robin."

"Artemis."

The two sidekicks simply started at each other, daring one to go first.

Artemis caved first. "You gonna get in?"

"What's the hurry?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe the giant spiders crawling around Rio that we're supposed to help get rid of."

"Point taken. How's your cousin?"

"F-fine. Why do you ask?"

"It's typically polite to ask after one's family members. Or so I hear."

Artemis just nodded skeptically. "Okay… she's, um, actually in the hospital."

"Hospital? What happened?"

"Broken arm."

"How?"

_Think quick, Artemis_. "She fell off a horse."

Robin dramatically sucked a breath in. "Ouch. That's gotta hurt. Tell her to feel better soon."

"I will, but right now we have spiders to kill."

"After you."

_Darn bats_.

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><p>.<p>

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	2. Jokers are not Welcome Here

AN: Thanks for favs/ follows/ reviews! You guys are awesome

Responses:

Updater102: Thanks! And particular day... No, I just update whenever the chapter is ready.

Nightwriter222: Thanks you! I love doing dialogue pieces. Sometimes all the narration clutters up the story for me. The Morse code? Yes, it was supposed to spell 'Young Justice', but, uh... I'm no expert, so I'll fix that. Thanks for telling me.

Part 2

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><p><em>.<em>

_Shlick!_ An arrow embedded itself in the bricks next to Robin's ear. "Jeez, Arty! Way to call it close!"

The archer jumped up from behind an overturned crate of dying fruit. Seriously, what kind of garbage collection system did this city have? "Sorry, thought you were someone else."

"I can see that."

An awkward silence drew out as Robin walked to the teleport booth. He punched the numbers in.

_Access denied _

"Crap." He punched them in again. _Access denied._

"What's up?" The archer leaned in to have a better view of the control screen.

"We've been locked out."

"What? How? Does Batman know?"

Robin tapped on his wrist computer. "I can't find the source. It must be an internal issue. I'd have to be at the cave." He held a finger to the comm unit in his ear. "Robin to Batman."

He must have gotten an answer because he continued, "The Zeta tube entrance in the Billiard Alley is nonfunctional. Has there been a breach?"

Artemis waited out the pause wondering what it must be like to have the Batman as a mentor. She wondered if Robin was used to people wondering what it was like to have the Batman as a mentor.

"Right. We'll take the one on Harvard. Robin out."

"What did he say?"

"The other ones are operational as far as he is aware of. The League will have someone down to fix this one when they can."

"Okay. I just hope we don't find another intruder in the cave like last time."

"Hmm." Robin agreed. "One Red attack is enough, I think." He pulled out a batarang and shot it up the adjacent roof. Artemis followed him up with a cable arrow.

"So, what brings you to Gotham this time?"

Artemis ran past a chimney. "Pet show." _Really, girl, that was the best you could come up with?_

"Pet show? You have a dog?"

"No. Um, my… aunt… does. A corgi."

"Ah. What's its name?"

"Joker."

Robin, who was way ahead of her anyway at the other end of the roof, stopped and gaped. "Joker? And she lives in Gotham?"

"Well, yeah…"

"Mite insensitive, isn't it?"

"She's got a weird sense of humor. Where are we going?" Artemis tried to change the subject.

They grappled up to the next building, startling some poor souls out on the balconies. Robin shouted an apology as he knocked off a pot of chrysanthemums. "The Harvard Avenue teleport entrance. It's less used, but just as effective. What's this 'Joker' like?"

"He's a dog…"

"I got that."

"Well what else do you want me to say?"

"Something about the dog…"

"Why?"

"'Cause I like dogs."

"I don't doubt that, but it's still a strange question."

"Fine! Just ignore it then. We're here."

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><p>.<p>

I actually do have a friend with a dog named Joker, so here's a shout out to her. I have no idea if it's a corgi or not.

.

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	3. Don't Forget the Chili

AN: Two stories and two updates in two days. Not bad.

Part 3

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><p>.<p>

_Whap_! "Robin!"

Artemis spun on the teen hero. "Now who's sending friendly fire?"

"Whoops. You're right. The shadows do make you look like a criminal."

"Gee, thanks."

"Not that you do! I… sorry."

"Why do you always get here at the same time as me?"

"Maybe I just hang around here all day waiting for you to show up."

"…Do you?"

"No. That would be creepy. I'm not a stalker."

Artemis smirked. "No, you're a bat, which is nearly the same thing."

"A detective is not a stalker."

"Coulda fooled me."

Robin cackled darkly. "Ready to go bust some heads?"

"Not creepy, eh?"

"You know what I mean."

"I'll pretend I do."

"How's your cousin's arm?"

"Oh, we're doing this again, are we? She's fine."

"Good. How's GA?"

"Fine."

"He make any of his chili recently? I know Batman's been wanting some."

"He makes chili?"

"You didn't know? And you say he's your uncle." Artemis felt a shiver go up her spine. He didn't know, did he? "You should ask him for some. I know Speedy loves it."

"And I should trust Red Arrow's opinion on anything, why?"

"Because if GA's your uncle, the RA's practically your cousin. Does he know your cousin in Gotham?"

"No, he doesn't."

"Hm. You should introduce them. Speedy needs more friends."

"I doubt he'd like my cousin."

"Why's that?"

How did she get into these situations? It was like Robin was deliberately backing her into a corner. Which he probably was. Darn bats. "She's very… anti-social. Barely talks to me. Sometimes her mom can't even get to speak in the morning."

"That could just be normal teenage behavior."

Artemis shrugged. She couldn't really come up with a response to that. "Bet you five dollars Wally's eaten that cake M'gann baked yesterday."

Robin went along with the subject transition. "Only five? I bet you twenty he's eaten the cake and the spaghetti you brought in from Culinary. Very nice job, by the way."

"Thanks. You're on."

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><p>.<p>

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	4. Busted

AN: Voila! Le fin!

(This one's my personal favorite) (Because Robin's hilarious)

Thanks once again for the favorites, follows, and reviews!

Part 4

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><p>Artemis ran into the alley where the teleport was located. She'd just received an urgent call from Red Tornado about a new mission to somewhere in Asia. Her English teacher hadn't been too convinced by her sick performance, but it did its job. Ducking into a corner, she quickly changed out of the articles of clothing that screamed, 'Gotham Academy' the loudest.<p>

As she finished tying up her hair, another figure ran around the corner into the alley. A boy with dark hair wearing a Gotham Academy uniform identical to hers, minus the skirt, skidded to a halt in front of the phone booth. His wide blue eyes stared at her like a deer in the headlights. "Artemis?"

Artemis stared suspiciously back at the boy. "Do I know you?"

"Uh, no…"

"Wait a minute! You were that kid who took the picture of me on my first day!"

The boy frantically glanced around for an exit. "No, I wasn't…"

"Grayson, isn't it?"

"Um…" The boy gave up. "Yeah."

"What are you doing out here?"

Grayson – she couldn't remember his first name except that it was something mildly embarrassing – stuttered, "I'm, um, sort of hiding."

"Why?"

Grayson sighed. "I skipped school and Bruce found out and now he's sent Alfred after me."

"Who?"

"Never mind. If you see an old English man in a limo, don't mention you saw me." And the boy was gone, running off down the other end of the alley. Artemis watched him dash around the corner, pulling something small out of his pocket.

Weird.

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><p>Thanks for reading!<p>

.

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	5. Nothing like a Holiday Break-in

AN: Um, I don't really have anything to say about this one. So...

Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited/reviewed! You're all awesome! Holiday cookies to you!

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><p>All she had wanted to do was have some fun, beat up some thugs, and call it a night. She had an English test tomorrow, and she couldn't very well write anything comprehensible about Macbeth when operating on only five hours of sleep.<p>

But, no, the jewelry thieves she'd engaged had bombs, and Artemis was not yet skilled enough to add 'bomb diffusor' on her ever-growing list of talents.

Fortunately, she knew someone who did.

"Took you long enough to get here," Artemis growled at the newcomer. Three men surrounded her, three very big, burly men, who, according to her fist, were made out of rock. This is not an ideal situation for a hero with long-range weapons and one hand tied behind her back, literally.

Cackling met their ears from above, and the thugs looked around warily. Three batarangs zipped out of the darkness, unleashing a gray fog as soon as they hit the ground. Artemis felt someone fall to the ground behind her. "You should have seen the traffic," a boy's voice quipped.

"Oh, so we've had an influx of ninjas lately? Or has Catwoman brought in some friends?" The archer, now freed from her single-hand bondage, grabbed her bow and leapt up onto one of the jewelry display counters to gain some altitude.

"Both. And neither."

"What the heck is that supposed to mean?"

"Stick around and maybe you'll figure it out."

In her mind, Artemis cursed the Bats of the world for being so cryptic. "Thanks for the back-up, by the way."

Robin flipped up onto the counter below her, kicking one man in the stomach as he did. "No prob. Batman was going to start nagging me about training, so I appreciate the distraction." Another flip, punch, and a boxing glove arrow to the face, and their attackers fell to the floor. Robin stood in the center of the bodies . "Now, you said something about bombs?"

"Over by the safe. Whole pack of them. Bozo here –", she pointed at a man with an abnormally large and protruding nose, " – was messing with them, but nothing has happed other than a bunch of colored lights."

The two teens made their way over to a mustard colored bag filled with soft clicking noises. "Yeah, that could be bad," said Robin, kneeling down and gently pulling one of the box-shaped containers out. "Huh."

"What is it?"

"Standard bomb. You know, timer, colored wires, ominous ticking noise. Almost theatrical really."

"So it's not a problem?"

"I didn't say that."

"But you can stop them?"

"Of course. Just give me a minute…" The young hero set to work, tapping on his computer glove and playing with wires, of which nearly all were black, so Artemis didn't really know how he told them apart. What happened to 'cut the red wire'?

It didn't take long for her to begin pacing. There was a timer, right? Bombs usually had timers. How long before this one went off? Did Robin actually know what he was doing? Of course he did, he's the Boy Wonder… Was her mom looking for her? Was she worried? She would have to take notes for English tonight, that essay wasn't going to write itself…

"Enjoying Gotham?" Artemis flinched at the sudden question.

"Aren't you supposed to be focusing?"

"Yeah, sure. I am. But you need to call down, and talking helps."

"Whatever."

"I hear the holiday lights are nice."

"Yeah, they are. I ran by them on the way here. Very bright. Are you done yet?"

"Almost. What are you getting your cousin for Christmas? I mean, if she celebrates it…"

"Huh? Oh, uh, I thought I'd get her a book on snakes or something. She's into reptiles this year. How about you?"

"What am I getting my cousin?" He pulled out miniature pliers.

"No, what… Are you sure that's the right wire?"

"Of course." And he cut it. Artemis tensed.

The funny lights dimmed and the ticking stopped. She relaxed.

Robin rubbed his brow. "Well, that was fun."

The archer just nodded.

"What were you going to ask? Before…" He gestured at the obvious metal package.

"I just wondered… what you wanted for Christmas."

"Oh." Robin looked surprised. "Hmm. The usual. World peace, an elephant, a snowball fight with the team."

"An elephant?" Robin grinned sheepishly. "I'm not sure about that, but I know we can make one of those come true."

"Thank you, O Genii." He bowed majestically. Artemis refrained from swatting the mischievous smirk off his face. "How about you? What do you want for Christmas?"

"Haven't really thought about it. I guess…" She thought about what she'd gotten in the past, and how much had changed just over this last year, these last few months.

"World peace sounds nice. With hot chocolate, of course. Now come on, I have a murderous Scottish thane to analyze."

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><p>AN: So, people are following this even though it was supposed to be over... I guess, if anyone has an idea for a chapter (something Artemis or Robin saysdoes/whatever) if you could mention it in a review, I'd try my best to write a chapter including it.

I just finished the first half of Gotham. Really awesome, it is. Can't wait for Monday! Wow, 2015...

Cool.

Reviews are nice. As are cookies. But cookies are hard to fit through computer screens, so reviews will do.


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